no grass is really green

Soooo, I'm going to put my past on blast right now....

In order to make a valid point...

But at this point I have nothing to hide...

I need to be accepted for who I once was and who I am now...

If you cant love me for both, then I am more sorry for you then I will ever be for me...

So plainly put...

I used to be a "DAWG"...

I was heartless, disrespectful, manipulative and a compulsive user...

I have always excelled in sports and pretty much anything I have ever placed my interest in...

This throughout life has always placed me in a position to have the attention of women...

So in ignorance I used that interest to my advantage...

over indulging in way more the my share of intimacy...

and it seemed the more of a "DAWG" I was the more women seemed to yearn to attempt to make me settle down.

and I never did back then...

women would go to great lengths to try to prove that I should be with them...

They would practically do anything I requested of them..

And I mean ANYTHING!

I grew up, I matured, i learned to deal with the root of the issue when it came to me and relationships...

which had more to do with myself then it had to do with relationships themselves...

So I took some time off...

I didn't date, talk, hang out with any females for a year and a half straight...

To get myself together, through prayer, self reflection, fasting and learning to forgive self and others...

Now...

I'm all into monogamy and building a future with a woman...

but the strangest thing has happened...

Now, that I have become this man...

The man most women "say" they desire...

The women I usually would have eating out of my hands in a sense...

Don't want to settle down...

It's a crazy spin of realities!!!

Now I do know in the sense of Karma, I must pay for my past sins...

so when does paying stop?

hmm.

So the question I have been asking myself is why is it that when you have a "DAWG" you hold on for dear life, and when you have a man that will cherish and honor you, you push him away and run for life?

Is it just a facade?

ladies is it just a lie that you tell yourselves in order to seem as though you are a deserving and good woman?

or have things gotten so bad in the dating game...

that women are so scarred due to "DAWGS" they have dealt with, they don't know how to recieve or dont want to receive a man into their lives?

Seeing both side of the spectrum here...

Makes me understand the emptiness of a "DAWGS" lifestyle...

and the disgrace of knowing that "nice guys do indeed finish last"...

I've seen both lawns up close and personal...

in reality, "NO GRASS IS GREEN"